i hear you

by slog

Posted to Utterances on 2004-03-27 18:07:00

Parent message is 627034
like the sla rich white kids fight the rich white system…i dig you at a few months before 25 i am avoidant of everything that could = upper middle class professional existence…my reliance on existentialism buddhism,,,as yoko says all isms are daddies…mostly i’m thinking a certain ex of mine was sexually abused as a child and i should have saw it—but i was still on my 14 year binge at the time…know i do…my therapist made me paranoid she might be carrying my baby…and as much as i bitch about class struggle i think and act largely like a member of the educated bougeouis anyway…the fear further education (my b.s. nearly) will equal the kind of money grubbing sentiment my parents have (italian leather couches and all) really scares me…but if my therapist was right (i don’t think she’ll about she still bears the last vestiges of catholism–still practices-which is odd b/c the one i’m interested now isn’t like the forementioned they are uneducated lower middle class-the current objection of my non-affection is upper middle class catholic–like me we dont go to mass and has the same snotty snutty attitude)i’ll have to ‘rescue’ her—take away from that background and back to fort moore (the name i ascribe my parents 5 bathroom 5 bedroom big blue block of a house) and work for cendant and buy her and the child whatever they need/want but at first my parents will anyway…i almost hope she is…that way i’ll have an excuse to end this wanderlust—but if she is it really ruins of my plans of idaho–it was good enough for hemmingway…


hmm…tender situation i cant imagine my 60 y.o. therapist who has seen far worse then me would say something without good cause…

symbols

i am trying to be non-symbolic but societal pressure to conform is great-especially in a place like sd