Litkicks Message Board Archive

dare to answer

Posted to Action Poetry




born two months early
my mother hated god then
but she played let's make a deal with him
and named me jamelah faith
as a promise to teach me to believe
if i he would just
let me live
so i grew up
with this reminder
not religious but faithful
and i like peppermint and the way it
melts in my mouth
and soothes my nerves
and i do no dances well because i have clumsy feet
but i invented the superbowl dance
and it's gone international
in my moments of calm i curl up in grandpa's old recliner
and read the sound and the fury and
taste and smell and breathe faulkner's world
all the time thinking about being a famous version
of myself and eating pizza with green peppers on it
wondering if i could quit smoking
while i light another cigarette and mentally count my change
i realize i am out of diet coke
and i scowl because that's my favorite
and any other fizzy caffeinated beverage
just won't do it for me
i think about being a kid carrying around my blanket
(linus is my hero)
aunt vonnie made it for me when i was a baby
and she died before i got to know her
but the blanket's still soft
except for the rough edges
around the holes i burned into it
when i was four and i tried to warm it up
by putting it on top of a burning kerosene lamp
oh i can't wait for summer
that's when the pansies bloom
and scrunch their pansy faces at me
while i water them
after i watered the flowers
then i'd come inside to dinner
that included fresh pesto made from basil i grew myself
then i'd tell someone about the play
under milkwood i reread not to long ago with tears
welling in my eyes because dylan thomas just says it
so so right
and
yes
this girl
named jamelah faith
remembers the piano
that piano that has family pictures on it
that piano that collects dust and mocks me from the other side
of the living room
this girl
would eat a cup of worms for a million dollars
why not
i've never had a million dollars before
but maybe that's because i'm a reporter
who writes about city council and school board meetings
and makes no money and hates every second of it
and all i want to do is curl into my
red hooded sweatshirt
because i love it so much and i'd never get rid of it
you know adam sandler said it right
when he said
"red hooded sweatshirt i love you so"