the horrible crutch..
it feels like pounds of weigh on my chest coming hard, fast as my car driving down 81 without any ac
hurts like hell, like hell when i got these damn cravings for food but i couldnt eat
i couldnt sleep, i couldnt weep
i tried so hard not to feel any pain
but i just one day had to give in
i didnt have to, but my body was failing from lack of sleep
i couldnt dream anything deep
i couldnt hold any memories in my mind
my family, friends, i wanted to leave behind
so i felt someone, something out there was being unkind..
but i wanted some memories, some good ones, to wash away the horrible things id seen and heard, and
i waited for good to come while i was sitting alone feeling numb so it all wouldnt come to an end
the end was just really a way of getting outta my stupid town and my petty friends i thought couldnt help at all
but the end wouldve been a huge downfall from where i was then
and i wouldnt have held another memory or felt anything anymore at all so i decided to choose another way
i didnt wanna wake up, not for any reason, not any day
i just wanted the clouds to sink into my room w/ me and let everyone let me be to myself to keep me peacefully asleep
dreams were as close to the end as i could get
dreams were ways i could think of ideas to reach the end...
the numbness from what i took stopped those dreams, but now w/out that crutch its not like life was really as bad as it seemed.