fulfilling dreams.. eh.. something like that.
i sat staring at the stars and thinking i shouldnt be here and instead on a beach where i can sink my hands and feet in the sand where i can feel something better than the concrete jungle and hear this jazz on the boardwalk where the echoes in my head would last til i fell asleep then theyd jump across my sleep where id find you in charleston and hear some better jazz, meeting some 80s obscure band member like one from flock of seagulls or the fixx.. damn i need some kinda fixx when the groups an odd mix, ones left out and its always seeming to be me, but id like it be even so i could be not lost in two conversations, bonding, linking of arms, i miss all that so much and lifes sometimes lost its charm of bringing any new gifts or i just stoppped looking a while ago. almost lost hope that anything will work out w/ them. im tired of lost articles of the shelf falling down without me even realizing it, and having no control over whats falling, its destined to happen almost. i cant stop lookign tho. i cant stop looking but nothing or no one is anywhere near you. ill just sit and patiently wait for the even number to come, when i know it wont be easy to leave, and i know fitting or meeting someones great expectations is hard to achieve when a dream of me is hardly anything how in reality id be