Litkicks Message Board Archive

No Throat is as Big as a Zoo

Posted to Action Poetry

"I see visions of Cody!" I screamed.

And then I looked down to see that my throat was as big as a zoo, minus the snake exhibit.

My friend, Pearl, was alarmed and dropped her snowcone.

We were standing on the corner of Howard and Beale. A man diagonally across the intersection [of space and time] said he was mad as hell and .. he said .. "What was it he said, Pearl? I couldn't hear because the cement truck's light turned green."

"He said," said Pearl, "that he wasn't going to eat Grapenuts anymore."

Again the man spoke. "I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to eat Grapenuts anymore!"

"Well, now," I said. "Either my throat tickles or someone threw a banana into the monkey cages."

"And so it is." said Pearl.

"May I fondle your breast?" I asked.

"No!" she said. "What if my other breast gets jealous!?"

"You have a point," I sighed.

Suddenly a giraffe started to sprint across the clearing. "How could that be." I said with as much emotion as I could muster. "We aren't sausages!!".

--Sharik [Author of "I am Retarded"]