DAMN FINE PIECE, JAMELAH
Posted to Stories
by zygotenmycoffee on 2002-10-14 07:32:00
Nice, Crisp & clean prose. Your economy of style is very effective. You make every word count. The reader gets all the description he/she needs to complete the picture without being bombarded by a slew of wordy adjectives.
The short, one-line paragraphs pack a wallop. I especially like the first one: "They hated her. But they loved to watch her."
Doesn't everyone know a girl like that?
While this story is self-contained & complete within itself, I can't help feeling that it might be a chapter of something much bigger. If so, I would love to read more.
