my heart is falling out of my pants
my lungs are trying to burst through my throat
when did I become so sad.
when did it all become so sad,
someone tell me.
not something off the cuff.
tell me some sadness that you found.
and some eloquent wisdom,
some one knowing that craziness
compensates for this hole of weeping
in my solar plexus.
then i won't be so lonely.
are all the things that my writer-heroes felt
experienced, recorded unknowable
to me to me to me to me.
come on world, gimme what you got.
you ain't got nothing today.
and i want something.
'cos I got a lot to give,
and no one to give it to.
in ta missy.
give me some love.
wild and rude.
that gets up other people's noses.
I am getting desperate here.
and feel so sure that I'll go on being lonely.
and knowing it.
while all the other lonely people don't seem to notice.
or maybe that's the flexiglass between us.
and they can't see me feeling either.
so we'll never touch.
and no sex.
didn't think that I wanted to get fucked so much.
fucked by someone as crazy as me.
are all of us, the crazies,
spread like melted margarine droppings
across the earth.
or maybe my glasses really are blindness.