sunrises over the city
The sun rises over the city,
city morning vibes, 06:30 a.m. we wander
half waking, half dreaming.
In the shop we buy yoghurt and bananas, feels like something our bodies need.
Sometimes we don't say a word to each other, other times we talk meaninglessly about un-related things. Our minds not really there, not really anywhere.
Dave begins singing Micheal jackson 'Thriller' but he doesn't care cause he's spaced man. I have some song by deep forest going through my head called Madazulu. We always come out of the party with anything but rave music going through our heads. We comment as we always do how we never remember the music after the party. Only that the music was good and we had a great time.
At the bus stop someone says to us "You have a good night lads?"
"yeah brilliant, you?"
"Yeah sorted, did two Rolls royces, was on one man. Totally off it."
"Yeah its got to be done, you know what I mean?" he chuckles
"Yeah man, whats a few brain cells between friends."
"Absolutely, I mean you kill more braincells watching Eastenders on the telly than you do popping E's. I mean TV really fucks your head up." We all agree on this, then his bus arrives. "Nice one lads, see you next time." he says
"look after yourself mate, take care."
"Nice one." The young man pulls a face at us as he gets on the bus. Me and Dave pull faces back, then he's gone, and its quiet again. Dave comments that it is getting cold. I suddenly become aware of the chill and put my hood over my head to keep warm. More party people walk past. "Nice one lads!" they shout. They pull mad faces. Me and Dave Pull mad faces. We all find this funny and laugh. "What you lads been on tonight?" one of them asks.
"Elephants!" Dave shouts in a crazy voice,"We're on elephants!" "AAAAARRRRGGGGHH!" more mad face pulling. Then one of them comes over and shakes our hands.We all exchange the same feelings of well meaning warmth and sentiment. "My names Warren," he says to us.
"Great nice to meet ya."
"Yeah you too, banging night weren't it?"
"Wicked night man, absolutely wicked.. nice one... respect" Then their gone and its quiet again. Me and Dave stare at the bleak pavement. I am really beginning to feel the cold now.
Then I feel it, shit I hate this feeling, oh know please I don't want to, just a little longer, no..... THE COMEDOWN. UUgghhh one minute your up there you feel like everythings going to be alright that the worlds not such a bad place, you feel great empathy for everything, all is transcendental bliss. Then suddenly your back to Earth. Just like that, no warning, your just suddenly dropped from a great height onto the cold hard concrete.
Oh fuck welcome back to planet Earth and all the bullshit you forgot about. The fucked upness. The twisted ego madness. A moment ago it wasn't there. All was love and empathy and happiness. Your head was clear and you knew where you where heading man. All was euphoria, heaven.
Then suddenly your back to this place where people hurt each other and try to outfuck each other. Where the ego wants and wants and wants. Dave looks at me knowingly, nods in his wise way, then looks troubled, he's coming down too. I feel bleak and want to go home.
The bus gets here finally and we trudge on, Like two old men with the weight of the world on our shoulders. Suddenly my body feels dog tired, I slump into the seat not really knowing how. Don't feel so energetic anymore. Don't really feel anything about anything anymore. I lazily watch the city pass by through the window. My eyes start to become heavy and they close. next thing I know Dave is nudging me and its time to get off the bus.
We walk with tired legs not speaking.
Back home in complete exhaustion and relief we crash out and drift into sleep and bizarre wierd dreams. The mind can concoct strange images in sleep, especially on a comedown. several hours later.......
We wake up, And I don't feel the downer anymore. In fact I feel pretty good, so does Dave. We sit and chill, he lights up a spliff, has a few tokes then offers me some. I decline as I have quit tobbaco for 2 weeks now, and am determined to stay off it. Eventually we leave the house and the city looks great. I love everyone this morning the shopkeepers the bus drivers, everyone. The sun is shining I feel great. Poor Dave hes got to go to work now. But he don't seem to mind, he's used to it. Parties then going to work the next day its part of his life. "That was a cracking night, I had a really good night." he says
"Yeah I know. It was banging."
We look at each other in silence, we know whats coming next.
"Well Give us a bell Richie , come over and see us soon. Go for a beer later in the week or something."
"Yeah sound man, that would be great."
He suddenly gets all emotional and hugs me. "Take care." he says.
"Yeah and you. see ya soon mate."
We part our ways. He walks one way and I walk another. I suddenly feel really sad to be leaving my friend and going home. I always feel like this the next day. So much happens in one night. So much empathy, so much intimacy, openness and honesty between people. So much spiritual magic that you can't adequately put it into words. But through it all you and your mates, your all together in this sharing the same mindblowing exeriences, and in that sharing you feel closer.
I feel like a changed man today, I feel cleaner within and more determined to do what is right. Like there is some power from the night before that stays with me. Fuel for my inner fire as I make my way through the confusion which is life. Alone I walk to the bus stop, I feel at peace with myself and the world around me and smiling I realise how much I love the city I live in.