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6. In Which I Check Into the Ocean Sound Resort

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6. In Which I Check Into the Ocean Sound Resort

When the plane landed rough
Grabbed my bags quick
Fought my way up the aisle
Out the door quick to a
Waiting taxi out front
(Car rental counter was
Too packed to bother
I hate airports)
Jumped in the cab and
Said: "Where's
A good place for
A guy like me to
Spend a couple weeks?"
Taxi driver looked back at me
Like he'd never been asked
That type of question before
Only knew directions
Not advice
His name was Javier
Scratched his head and
Looked at the fare box
Said: "You might enjoy
St. Petersburg"
In his Cuban thick voice
Made myself comfortable in the back seat
Said: "Great
Take me to a nice hotel on
The Beach"
Javier flipped on the meter
Sunk his foot into the gas pedal
And darted to the coast
Flipped on the radio
To some Spanish station
Driving twice the speed limit the
Entire trip
No more than two feet off
The bumper of the car in front
He used the brakes sharply
Closed my eyes and tried to
Ignore impending doom out
The front windshield
Javier began to sing along in
Spanish
Ceramic and stucco
Drifted by out my window
Salty head seeped in
Through a crack in my window
Half an hour later
Javier was saying to me:
"Wake up man (like main)
We at the Ocean Sound Resort
This good?"
I looked outside
It was a huge pink castle
Looked interesting enough
"Yes Javier
Thank you"
Handed him my credit card
Clutched my bags
And jumped out the door into
An oven
God Damn was it hot here
I suppose Florida
Doesn't cool down in much the same way
That Ohio cools down in October
Walked up the marble front steps
Through the heavy wooden doors
And made my way to the front desk
An old couple was
Milling around by the brochure rack
Full of Aquariums
Jet Ski rentals
Parasailing trips
Deep Sea Fishing Outings
Cheap Sea Food Restaurants
And strip malls
Typical shit rack of tourist traps
That accompanies any resort hotel lobby
Made my way to the front desk
Rang the bell
Francis scurried up to help me
On the bottom of his nametag
Which read Francis Sketland
Was written his city of origin
Francis was from Kansas City
Said Francis: "How may I help you?"
Set my bags down on the ground
"I need a room
I don't have any reservations
It was a last minute trip"
He began typing frantically
Said: "Hmm
We might have
One suite available
But it's pricey"
Like an ambiguous man
"What's pricey?"
He typed some more
"Oh
Along the lines of
500 a night"
(500 a night)
"Great
I'll take it"
Francis began to type some more
Slippery glasses sliding
On his nose
Said I: "How's Kansas City
This time of year?"
He looked up like
I was the first person who read
That part of the nametag
"Oh
It starts cooling down I guess
Nothing like down here
That's for sure
Here's your key and
Charge card you can use at the restaurant
Massage parlor
And snack bar
You're room 1504"
I grabbed the key card and
Credit card
(That credit card is
A very dangerous thing
So easy to spend money)
A bell man ran over
Hurled my bags on the cart
Said quickly: "What room?"
"1504"
He grabbed me
Threw us in the elevator
Dropped me and my
Luggage off in my
Room
Scurried away after
I handed him 4 bucks
I looked around and
Realized I was standing in a foyer
To my left a living room
To my right a large white kitchen
A hall in front which
Appeared to hold 2 or 3 bedrooms
Along with 2 or 3 bathrooms
Balcony off to my left
And out the master bedroom in the back
I was graced with a corner room
Threw my bags in the middle of the floor
And figured
Might as well hit the beach
Grab a beer and
A margarita
And see if I
Can't get myself a sunburn