Litkicks Message Board Archive

Conversations With Bernadine...Part Two

Posted to Utterances




The story so far...Bernadine, mtmynd's 95 yr. old mother, has come home to die in her own bed with my 24 hr. care and the help of La Mariposa (the butterfly) Hospice. She is in stable condition with a very weakened heart and is bedridden and unable to even lift her head without help. She is experiencing pain for the first time in her long life and the whole ordeal is baffling to this woman who has lived a very full and vital life...

3:00 am
Bernie: "SoooooZen! Oh, SoooooZen..." She calls me through the baby monitor.

Me: "Wha? Just a minute Bernie", as I stumble out of bed from the upstairs guestroom where I've been sleeping. "What's the matter Bernie?"

Bernie: "Pain, pain, pain" she whispers...

Me: "I'll get you some tylenol, hang on."

Bernie: "Why did this have to happen to me!!!" She's mad now.

Me: "Yeah, why's this have to happen to me too?" said with a laugh.

Bernie: chuckling, "We're quite a pair, aren't we!"

Me: "yep, we are"

Bernie: "Can you move me up a bit?"

This is a constant request of Bernie's, as she gets uncomfortable laying in one position and must be moved frequently. I had a back spasm Saturday trying to help Cecil move her and was in severe pain from the effort.

Me: "Nope, hauling you around this bed is like hauling a sack of feed clear around the block. You will have to wait 'till Cecil wakes up to be moved. I can roll you over though."

Bernie: "Okay, don't roll me off the bed." (she laughs)

Me: "We are going to have to get a hospital bed."

Bernie: "No! I want my own bed." (she is emphatic)

Me: "It's not for you, it's for me! I can't bend over like this much more and Cecil and I both have bad backs."

Bernie: "Ohhh! This is disgusting. I wish I could get up and walk!!!"

Me: "I'm not Jesus, you'll have to settle for a cup of juice."

Bernie: (laughing) Yeah, my mouth is really dry, I guess you like that I can't talk too well."

Me: "Something had to shut you up..."

We both laugh.

Bernie: "I think I can go back to sleep now. Thank you, thank you."

Me: "you're welcome, welcome."

To be continued...


SooZen
1-27-03