I know. After reading Fountainhead
I felt so far from the "ideal man" that instead of being inspired by Rand's egotism, individualism, etc., I got depressed with my own, well, not necessarily total incompetence, but inability to depend only on myself, that's for sure. As I am thinking about Rand's philosophy more and more, I start realizing that, even though she has some really solid arguments, she becomes too radical in her views, which brings her closer to those she is actully fighting: the ideologists. Her refusal to question her own philosophy takes the important element of questioning away from her thnking, which then becomes too imposing -- like a system of conformity.