Litkicks Message Board Archive

Also, economy...

Posted to Haiku Board




of language might apply here.

"The full moon is pink" could easily become "pink full moon--" and not loose anything.

However, I do agree with kkizer. There are too many images in this haiku, and, while the moment has been captured well, I think honing the first two lines down into one, more compact image, would be better.