Litkicks Message Board Archive

departure

Posted to Poetry




that night i spent saying good-bye
that night when julia came over telling me to be good, to brush my teeth every night before i go to bed and to take care and to never change and to keep listening to nirvana and wearing leather pants and not to forget her and all the crazy things we ever did together in the 15 years we proudly count looking back
that night when elvis shook my hand with sadness in his eyes saying nothing more than "we'll call you tomorrow"but meaning so much more, "thanks for being there", "i hope you're gonna be ok", "be careful", "we're gonna miss you" among other things
that night when claudiu held me in his arms not saying anything but i still knew what was going round his head, pieces of his thoughts kept hitting me like baseballs thrown by a poor player, nothing waisted, nothing spent but nothing won, just another girl and another guy breaking up on the fucked up ways of life and then i lay back in his arms and looked up at the cruel autumn sky and for the first time in my life it seemed so beautiful but so far away, empty and indifferent, like there was no angel up there shining his love down on us any more
that night when he left refusing to say good-bye, walking away into oblivion, into the dark, into the moon, not looking back and i felt i had just lost the only guardian angel i ever had
that night of our feelings intensified by the realisation that for the first time in our lives things wouldn't stand the same the next morning, that our words would forever echo in the past of a hot autumnfarewell under the full yellow moon
that night when the world vibrated at our feet like it had vibrated 1000 times before, in another 1000 perfect moments, but it was only now that we felt it vibrating, paralised by the intense fear that it would never vibrate again and we would find ourselves so completely alone at the other end of "we'll keep in touch"
that night i spent saying good-bye