Valentine's Weekend, My Saint.
I never fucked so hard in all my life, so innocently.
I never pressed myself so deep around somebody else
With so much intention and at the same time
Only it was a lesser Me that I was leaving behind
A selfish runt who bore the brunt of
As lunch sat on the stove considering burning and
He mounted me standing in the centre of the room, and
We kissed for a minute to the Pixies before
He dropped his cropped short sweats and carried
Me into the salon where he
Proceeded to fuck me hard like a punk, teetering
On the edge of the sink
Wearing still his tightly white T and
His short spikey hair and his ambiguity
He just opened me right up from
The centre of my quiet little inner parlour,
And sucked the hard core out of me.
In black and white and blue and sunlight
Everything flooded back, the memory of
How we used to be, how it once was and why
I ever took his hand and listened to him speak in the first place.
When he was the boy I wanted to emulate,
When he was the conversation I burned to get in on,
When he was the island I longed to sail off to
And wander the rest of my days away,
Naked and sunning myself on his rocky shores,
Spontaneously diving into his unmapped warmness
Absorbing his music and society and culture
Like Hemmingway gone off to Cuba.
And I remember now what love is like
How it smells red, and tastes of ripeness
And I may never know the Universality of all
Men who love women or
Men who love men
But I know what it’s like for me to love him,