Litkicks Message Board Archive


Posted to Haiku Board

for your critique, which I took in the friendliest of manner. you are right that it is certainly wordier than most of what I do or like to do. This one came to me because of a science class on how green is reflected so I thought green lonely and the wonderful paradox that it is everywhere therefore. But I changed it, since the science couldn't really fit in, to make the other colors lonely, even green with envy, at the explosions of green. I have been reading Dogen's zen poetry, in waka, and he writes more in this style so I suppose it was echoing for me.